On hiding Barnaby

Cartoon: Matt Golding
It seems the Nationals plan to "hide" former leader and serial drongo, Barnaby Joyce, for this year's election campaign, restricting him to campaigning within the boundaries of his electorate. Clearly, Barnaby has become a party liability, although his popularity in his rural heartland remains high. Mind you, restricting Barnaby to New England still means he has a lot of ground to cover. It's the twelfth largest federal electorate by area and covers a vast swathe of central west and northern New South Wales. 

Of course, the Nats could hide Barnaby permanently by just disendorsing him. Find themselves a candidate who won't embarrass the party by getting pissed and passing out on the footpath in the middle of Canberra or knocking up a junior staffer while trumpeting CFV*. Ah, yes. Good old CFV. The public fallback position for all conservative pollies while they're privately pursuing anything but. They roll it out regularly in order to point accusing fingers  at the moral failings of progressiveness and social justice.

Not the best look
 Barnaby is in no danger of losing his seat, which he held with a 13% margin at the 2022 election. So why does the party want to keep him out of the public campaign?

Let me count the ways ...

There was the (literal) "watergate" corruption scandal when he was Minister for Agriculture and approved an $80million water buyback project from Eastern Australia Agriculture, a company that donated heavily to Liberal Party and of which Energy Minister Angus Taylor was a director. It turns out that most of the taxpayer money spent on the buyback ended up in the coffers of EAA's parent company in the Cayman Islands.

There was his $675,000 "Drought Envoy" trip that resulted in, well, nothing. No report received and no accountability for the money that was spent.

Always sartorially elegant
Prior to his affair with his (now) wife, there was an allegation of sexual harassment from another staff member. The Nationals apparently conducted an inquiry into the allegation but findings were "inconclusive."

In 2017 he, along with four other MPs and Senators, was ruled by the High Court to be ineligible to stand for election under Section 44 of the Constitution on grounds of dual citizenship. At the time Barnaby claimed he didn't know he was a dual citizen of New Zealand and was surprised to learn that he was. His forced resignation from the parliament put the Turnbull government into minority until he won the subsequent by-election.  

Then there was his comment last year at an anti-windfarm demonstration when he told protestors to “load that magazine” at the voting booth against the prime minister, Anthony Albanese, and the energy minister, Chris Bowen and likened votes to "bullets". Yeah, because shooting solves everything.

Not to mention the incident last January when he was photographed drunk and prone on a footpath in central Canberra mumbling obscenities into his  phone.

 All of which brings us to the question: why on god's little green earth is this scandal-plagued, politically inept, morally bankrupt boofhead being shielded by the party he could potentially damage beyond redemption?

Well, for starters, they want to keep New England at all costs and, for some unfathomable reason, he keeps getting elected there. He won the seat when the admirable, ethical and highly respected independent member, Tony Windsor, resigned. 

The Nats are shit-scared of two colours: green and teal. Green represents environmentalism, and despite the National Party rural heartland being totally reliant on there being a sustainable environment, they're hellbent on destroying it by digging it up or cutting it down. Go figure. 

Their aversion to teal is a little more complex than just gut reaction. Teal represents a growing dissatisfaction with establishment politics. Every established party is now nervous about the rising tide of progressive, mostly female, climate-focused independent candidates, but the Nats are particularly vulnerable. They hold just 14 of the 151 federal seats. This is just one seat more than are held by Independent members. The average age of National MPs is the highest of all the parties at 52, while the Independents are the youngest bloc. Well over half the voting population is aged 18-55. 

Crucially, in the finance-focused world of electoral politics, the Nats are lagging well behind the indies and the other parties in terms of fund-raising. They are, to put it bluntly, increasingly being seen as yesterday's party. And like the smell of stale beer on the carpet after last night's bash, or the pissed guest who just won't leave, their time is up. The Nats are well aware that Barnaby Joyce represents both the smell of stale beer and the pissed guest, and if they want to retain the seats they hold, they need to get out the Glen20 and keep him well and truly locked in the bathroom while the house is on the market and open to viewers.

But then, they could just disendorse him ...


*Christian Family Values


 





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